Good Flights

01:10am

I’m sitting in the aisle because it’s better than the middle seat I was given. My preference is window seat but we don’t always get what we want. I could, but on principle, I refuse to pay the airline for chair. I'm already paying for you to carry me. Why am I asked for a different amount to sit down? Was I going to fly standing? Even birds, our prototype don't stand. When did greed push us here?

01:28am

Sitting at the aisle is a huge responsibility as I’m the gateman of the row. I want to sleep. I imagine myself turning to ask the people I’m safe guarding, "do y’all want to use the restroom or stand up? Because the gateman is about to fall asleep." With it comes a small power. If someone wants to go to the loo and I refuse to get up till they pay me what will happen? Like Rihanna, I call the sho sho shots.

01:49am

Aisle sitting means I see everything. Well, almost. Shortly after they served us a snack of mini pretzel biscuits and a 30ml drink, two air hostesses started pushing the food cart. I smell bread and see drinks. I think to myself, if I knew the food was coming so soon, I’d have saved the biscuit snack thing to eat much later but to my surprise, they took the cart past me. I thought they’ll serve first class and business first but the cart just rolled past me again and it didn’t stop so, they’re not serving my side. It feels like a Nigerian wedding when they’re serving one side and you call the waiter to ask for yours and they say, “this is for only the groom's side.” Or you ask for continental and they say, “it’s for only one side.” The fact that you have to ask means you’re not a consumer.

02:05am

Food is finally being served for my side. I’ve just finished one chapter of my book and I want to nap. But food is here. I adjust my chair to get comfortable and see the people behind me: they’ve already pulled their table down and opened it fully. Ready for the food to land. I’m wrapped for sleep even though I know food is coming. I wonder if they weren’t taught to act shy or aloof when you see food making its way to you. This is why I can’t date a white person, how do you explain that the sight of food that is for you and you’re hungry, you still have to form for it? Play a bit hard to get, uno? The people behind me, what if food finishes before it gets to them? Then they’ll be subjected to closing their table shamefully. They would have avoided that if they formed a bit.

Update: I formed too hard forgetting that I was actually tired and slept off. And you know air hostesses don’t wake nobody so that’s how my food passed me by.
I guess there are holes in the forming for food upbringing we had. To be honest, there are a bunch of holes in our upbringing.

1pm, Heathrow

Feeling stressed but happy now because a group of Asian women hustled to let me move forward on the security queue. I mean hustled like moving the divider and asking people to allow me get ahead. I was able to speak to one of them while waiting for security to check my liquids. They’re a group of 14, mostly women headed to Lisbon for holiday. I thought it was incredibly cool to find 14 people to vacation with. Not my type of time but bless their hearts for making sure I caught my flight.
Context: My first flight was delayed for 3hrs plus. Naturally, I missed my next flight and was booked on the next next flight. The only issue was, the airline didn’t envision that even that flight was cutting things too close because airport security is unpredictable. I had barely 20mins to find my gate, pass security and get to my boarding gate.

1:15pm

I was running to my flight because I saw the flight closing on the screen and one of the attendants asked me to slow down. “You’re not late. We don’t have a full flight today.” And that’s how I forced myself to slow down and walk into the flight.

1:50pm

Departure delay on the tarmac.

2:57pm

I’m reading the book a therapist recommended last year a week after I lost my job. It’s a week to my resumption nearly a year later and we had a session and she recommended the book again not knowing she had recommended it before. The chapter talks about procrastination. It suggests we look at procrastination as self discovery rather than self blame. It also suggests that when we use other activities to avoid critical tasks, to check if we have genuine interests in those, explore them as side quests or career options maybe. It further suggests we ask questions about the task we’re avoiding: if I like it? If I want to do it? If I have the skills to do it?

5:26pm

I’ve spent an hour in the immigration queue. Obviously won’t make it to class at this rate. Or I’d be extremely late. Why there are only 2 people attending to a stream of people with all passports is beyond me. It’s humane I think. No concern or thought spared for our well being. How have they travelled? How long did it take for them to get here? Zilch. Just keep them on a line for over an hour after doing some step 1 passport scanning outside. So what was the point of the passport scanning if I’d still spend what looks like 2hrs on the queue?

5:32pm

So it’s actually one person assigned to respond to all. How cruel. BVG has plans for strike this weekend. Lufthansa is in talks of a day strike. Now, these strikes greatly inconvenience passengers but when workers are subjected to unfair treatment, strike is the only way for some progress.

5:56pm

The couple in front of me are talking to each other and making jokes. They were both wearing jackets an hour ago at the beginning of this mess. When it was sunny and we were only tired from the flight. Their jackets now hang on their suitcases but they’re occasionally laughing and talking through this absurdity. I guess it’s why people lean into partnerships. 4 people in wheelchairs have been brought forward from the flight that just landed. Obviously they’d have priority because of their unique situation. I must admit I did feel a tinge of annoyance about them skipping the queue. This is what this stupid system does. Causes me to lose my humanity and grace because of artificial personnel scarcity and frustration of standing for nearly 2hrs after an over 12hr flight. I literally got to the airport this time yesterday, so full 24hrs just to get home.

6:03pm

Tolu mentioned that the e-entry thing works and I went to try it. Nope, didn’t work for me. Definitely going to spend most of tomorrow horizontal and in silence.

6:49pm

In the Regional Bahn to drop at Sudkreuz. I got a seat in a section of 4 seats and started snacking on the nuts I carried on my initial flight out to Pittsburgh. Some older couple are now sitting in front of me talking but I’m listening to Good flirts and I don’t care for which or what they’re saying. I just want to be home. I wish that I was going home to someone and something warm. I would also love to go to class this evening so I don’t get 4 absences but I’m my on the same battery as my AirPods: 10%. I have to get wired headphones soon. My class starts at 6pm. It’s 6:55 and I’m still on my way home. If I’m home before 8, I’ll go even if it’s for attendance. I’ll eat quickly and go.

7:48pm

I’m tired and my head aches. I can make it to class since we end at 9pm. The moon and stars are out and it’s making me blush big. I shared Good flirts with Yinka and he got it. Said it sounds like an old Nigerian hip hop song and it feels good. Even though my brain is too tired to come up with words why I put it on repeat since I first played it, his words perfectly describe what I feel listening to it. Happy that I can share music and he gets it. I can’t believe he’s getting married and I won’t be in attendance. May is Pearl’s and his and I can attend none. Great. Just great.